It's time to discover where the common characteristics of being raised in a dysfunctional family come from. We weren't born with these characteristics but we developed them in a response to a particular situation in our childhood. It's helpful, even vital, to understand this.
Fill out the table below. The columns lead us towards a particular trait and we fill it in as best we can with the memories we have. Think of an event from your childhood that stands out and see if you can think of what happened, why it happened, how you responded and which characteristic it reminds you of today. There's an example in the first column. See Step 16 for clues on which characteristic it reminds you of.